Happy Halloween to those who celebrate! This month we're bringing some wild, wacky, and spooky updates your way--because we could all use a splash of fun on our timelines 👻

‍

Scott's Scaries: What Does a Fearless Leader Fear?

Though we often call Scott our "fearless leader," the reality is: he's afraid of a few things. Our October update includes a short list of things you probably shouldn't bring up next time you see Scott at a networking event.

‍

1. Stingrays

As someone raised in the era of Steve Irwin (may he rest in peace), this one might seem like a given, but Scott actually has his own experience with these much-loved touch tank dwellers.

It was a bright and stormless day on the coast of Belize when Scott and his family were taking an exciting cruise excursion to a sandbar in the middle of the ocean. They were surrounded by water with land barely visible, but the sandbar made it possible to stand and watch as dozens of stingrays circled the vacation-goers. Suddenly, Scott found himself completely surrounded by stingrays, who seemed less "pet me, we're fun" and more "deadly ocean animal" at the moment. One swam directly for him (with murder in its eyes) and dove between Scott's legs, causing him to panic. His hero, a large Belizian man who was leading the excursion, scooped him up and tossed him like a ragdoll into the boat, where Scott remained (safe, at last from stingrays) for the remainder of the excursion.

2. Bats

This one is a more recent wound (literally), as Scott scooped up a bat that was terrorizing their living room and was bit on the hand. He spent the day on the phone with various governing bodies and in an out of the ER and animal clinic. In the end, he hadn't been exposed to rabies after all, but he has held onto a healthy fear of the little fuzzy creatures. And for some reason, he's developed a strange aversion to garlic bread...

‍

3. That Which He Does Not Understand

Examples include "skibidi", NFTs, Time Zones, the Popcorn button on the microwave, and the bluetooth pairing function on bluetooth speakers (that does nothing).

‍

4. Hard Drive Failures

Those who have read our thrilling article on data security in the modern era will recall the Hard Drive Calamity of 2015--the very mention of which causes horror movie sound effects to reverberate through our home office halls...

A word to the wise: keep your data safe. Don't trust hard drives.

‍

UNF Pet Division: Halloween Edition!

Because we simply couldn't help ourselves, we're ending this one with another tour of our UNF Pet Division in their Halloween finest. Beware: Spooky photos ahead!

Thanks for joining us for our Halloween update! If you'd like to receive updates like these direct to your inbox, be sure to sign up for our newsletter: The Filmstrip. You won't regret it.